Different Outfit Day 22 | Body Image

Can we talk body image?

I’m not a twig. I won’t ever be. I’m curvy, wavy, lumpy, fluffy. Whatever you want to call it, it’s not so straight. But I’m also not one of those women who is in love with her fat. You will not find my celebrating the excess around my middle or the shape of my thighs. I can celebrate the shape of my body, celebrate that I am in fact a woman and shaped like a woman. It’s just so easy to be unsatisfied with what I see in the mirror.

Wearing actual clothes this month has made me think of my body more than ever before. The way clothes fit or fall. My waistline and hemlines and necklines. Focusing on my clothes makes me look at what’s underneath in a different way.

Earlier this week, I saw a photo of myself from almost four years ago. At the time, I was nursing Julia, she was 7 months old, and I was the new mother who poured every second of myself into her. My hair was in a pony tail. I had bags under my eyes. I was smiling. But what I noticed in the photo was my round face. My full-moon face. Wide cheeks. I don’t think I’d lost an ounce of baby weight at that point. I lumbered. I was uncomfortable in my skin and clothes.

I’ve lost. 50 some odd pounds since then. It was all my baby weight, and then some. My body has changed. Everything is longer. I won’t say lean, yet, but I’m leaner. I’ve changed my eating habits. I’m (mostly) gluten free. Started exercising more. I’m making myself a priority.

But this month, I realize that I’ve gained more than I’ve lost. I’ve gained strength. I’ve regained some of myself. I’ve gained some self confidence back that I’d lost somewhere as my weight went up and my me time went down. And when I get dressed in the mornings, yes this means I have more options. All those clothes that didn’t fit before I look good in now. Some are loose even.

Here’s what I know. My body is far from perfect. I wear battle scars from surgery and stretch marks from pregnancy. When I wave, my upper arms wave too. I have a more than a muffin top. And I know have more weight to loose to be fully healthy.

I’m not a twig. I won’t ever be. But somewhere in the middle of all that I don’t love about my body, I can see it in a different way too. I can celebrate how far it’s come. How much it has done for me. And enjoy the challenge of how far I have yet to go.

And in the meantime, I’ll enjoy wearing my clothes.

Comments

  1. says

    This is lovely. I think it’s super important that everyone learn to love their body in whatever way is most comfortable for them. I happen to be one of those ladies who loves her fat…mostly just because that is what I needed to do and what I needed to learn in order to be healthy, but I think it’s amazing that you’ve learned your own healthy ways of body love! <3
    Sarah recently posted..10 Flea Market Tips & TricksMy Profile

  2. says

    I was saggy…. flabby… and round & soft. But after having 4 kids (6 pregnancies) and being 40 what do you expect!
    Needless to say I wasn’t happy with it and it was my own fault. I would eat and eat and eat more and then bake. And eat more.
    Terrible cycle really and I needed to stop it. I finally did and it’s been a long slow process but it’s getting better and I’m not so flabby. I eat better and feel better physically and emotionally and that is what is important.
    Jackie recently posted..What I hope… #BlogHer13My Profile

  3. says

    Oh I love this post! Confidence is the prettiest attribute a girl can have :) – and I loved seeing your outfits each day!!

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