Be Positive Day 14 | Cool To Be Negative

Today only one lane was open to check out at the store. There was just a short line, but I was behind someone with coupons and writing a check. I had a few minutes, and I’d just looked up from scanning magazine headlines to see a mom friend walk by. She looked beautiful, as she always does, well put together. Her handbag didn’t have room for diapers or snacks or toys for her kids who sat quietly in the double shopping cart. For a moment I felt jealous. I was workout clothes, pony tail, chewing my bottom lip. I’d just bribed my kids with raisins, and they were still squirming.

We exchanged hellos and how are yous while we waited in line. “I have just been so busy. And these kids,” she leaned her head toward the toddlers listening intently while Julia introduced herself and Max the way she does, bowing from the waist. “Oh! And I’m so glad that heat and humidity is gone. The a/c in the car is out.” I was nodding, listening, and unloading my shopping cart onto the conveyer belt. “My husband broke his ankle, so now it’s like I have 3 kids. Oh. And my mother wants to come visit, but then I’d have to clean my house, on top of everything else.” She took a deep breath and let it out, her cheeks stretched with her exasperation.

I left her after I’d paid. She was slowly piling her groceries on the conveyer. Each package seemed heavier than the last. Julia waved good bye, and her kids waved back. But I was left wondering when it became so cool to be so negative? I’m still wondering. When did we start expecting the worst possible answer when we ask how our friends are? Why does it sometimes feel like a competition to see who has the worst story, who can outdo whom with the worst possible news?

But I should say this. It wasn’t so long ago, that I was in the same spot. I would’ve rushed to tell the bad news first, wallowed in my self-pity, wanted everyone to feel sorry for me. But I’m trying hard to think in an opposite way. How lucky am I to have happy, healthy, active children? How amazing is this gorgeous weather? My husband loves me, loves his children, and works hard to take care of us. And how wonderful that my parents and in-laws are involved in my children’s lives. My life is beautiful.

And I realized too, that I have no reason to be jealous of my friend. I just wish I could open her eyes to the possibilities.

I am not trying to be political on In The Next 30 Days, but this quote from our president is close to perfection. It was posted on Life Pulp by JOY to the World.