I am always amazed by my friend Terri. (Hi Terri!) She has this insatiable desire to try everything and meet everyone. At a party, people flock her her. Her laugh echos around a room, and soon she has everyone around her laughing too, red-faced, doubled over, sometimes crying. I love her for her ability to charm everyone around her, and I admire her ease that she has while she does it.
It has taken me quite a long time (and some denial), but I have come to realize that I am not Terri. In that moment at the party, when a room full of eyes shift in my direction, my stomach suddenly knots. My hands fidget. I bite my lip. Awkward is best way to describe that feeling. I like one-on-one. I like small groups. I love time to myself, books. At a really busy party, I’ve slipped into a quiet bathroom to take a moment to myself. I like solitude. I’m an introvert.
It feels a little strange to write that out, but when it comes to getting to know me, my introversion is an important part of who I am. You see, if you find me out in a large group, you need to know that I will try, but I suck at small talk. If I look away or laugh nervously, it’s not that I don’t like you. I swear I’m trying. Hang in there, I really do want to get to know you better. And if you call my phone, more often than not I let it go to voice mail. I will call you back. Promise.
But being an introvert, for me, is a beautiful thing. Here’s why: I’m a great listener. I think before I speak. I respect your boundaries and needs because I have my own set of limits I like to stick to. I’m a good friend. I am self-sufficient, independent, calm, measured, and even-headed. I work hard with my head down at the quiet of my desk. And since all of these characteristics help make me who I am, I don’t mind being introverted at all.
Tell me, are you introverted or extroverted? And do you see it as an advantage or a disadvantage?
I am an introvert and I love that about myself. It means that you will get a great listener as a friend, someone who truly thinks through her decisions, words, and choices before speaking her mind, and someone who knows the beauty of sitting alone in silence.
For years, I worked in public speaking, up to 7 hours a day. It was trying, but I always fooled people. They never guessed I was an introvert unless they knew that I had to sneak solitude during my lunch hour, or stayed in my house for an entire weekend.
Jacki (@JackiRHayes) recently posted..When The Journey Began
Yes! I think introversion is a strength for me too. And I love hearing about your experience with public speaking. I wish I was more comfortable in that role, but it is something I’d like to work on. Maybe I need to make it a future 30 Days so I actually do it. 😉 Thanks for visiting!
Terri says
Well damn Anna,
The grass is always greener. I have always admired your strength, patience, steadfastness and humor. I always tell Robert that I wish I was more like Anna.
If only we could see ourselves as others see us. I have always thought of myself as a little shy. I feel awkward in new situations and I also need bathroom timeouts.
Thank God for alcohol the great social lubricator!
What would we do without it?
The bottom line is this: We make a great team. And oh my! if they could clone us into one person, we’d be unstoppable!!!
<3
What a nice reflection piece. I find that I also skew more toward the introverted side. But at work, I need to dial it up. I think I read that what really makes an introvert is their need to recharge by doing something more quiet. Reading, writing, solo exercise. Finally seems like introverts are getting their day … there has been a few books out lately recognizing their many gifts and why we should embrace them. Visiting from SITS. Happy Saturday!
Kerry recently posted..Finding “Me” Time is Essential for the Working Mom, For Any Mom
I agree that introverts are being recognized more. It’s such a challenge when people don’t get that you need quiet time alone. It was something I’ve really struggled with. I have found that I need a space that is all mine. Growing up, it was always my room. But now, it’s my desk. Even if it’s in a busy room (and it is), I can be alone in that space to refocus and refuel me. Thanks for stopping by, Kerry!
I am definitely an extrovert. Yet, I enjoy my alone time, too. Stopping by from SITS Sharefest on Twitter. This is a great post! 🙂
thedoseofreality recently posted..Pinterest Nightmare #129: Tron Inspired Watch
Thanks Ashley, and thanks for stopping by! I love that you walk the line between alone time and extroversion. It’s so great to have such balance.
I’m absolutely an introvert. Sometimes I’m afraid I border on anti-social. I used to hate that about myself, but not so much anymore. I’m more accepting about it now. Like you, I sometimes need to seek the quietness of an empty bathroom to regain composure, I much prefer texting to phone calls, and I’ll gladly take a night at home rather than going out.
Kristen recently posted..Right this second
It’s wonderful to accept yourself for who you are rather than who you want to be. Good for you, Kristen! I think there is strength in solitude, and that’s strength I’m working to celebrate more. Thanks for stopping by!
Introvert! Always wished I could be a Terri but have learned to love those same introvert qualities you mentioned. Yeah, for learning to like who you are!
a happier girl recently posted..Non Scale Victory: Sometimes size does matter
You’re exactly right. You have to know and celebrate who you are. That makes all the difference in your day-to-day happiness. At least it does for me. 🙂